Melancholic Derivations

November 18, 2006

New Horizons

I've blogged alot in the past year about melancholy, solitude and my dark thoughts. It was unavoidable, given the circumstances I found myself caught in; a maelstrom of uncertainty and hurt, washed away in my own grief and already melancholic nature. It hasn't been easy dealing with the issues this past year, but I'm glad to say I've come out stronger than before. I know I've declared myself free of emotional wreckage more times than I care to remember this year, but I can only say that this time I think it's really behind me. I'm joyful deep down, really I am.

Have you ever caught someone's gaze while they're looking dreamy? It's said that when you do, you get a true reflection of that person's soul. Right at that moment. It's amazing what you see when you aren't expecting to, astounding what you feel when you're not willing to. But I think I saw something right at that moment in time, I saw a glimpse of light. Some semblance of hope in an all-too-dreary future. And maybe that's what I need right now, something to kickstart my life back in order.

I'm not afraid to try again, and I hope it's mutual. But that's it, isn't it? I can only hope and pray that God's choice prevails. I'm apprehensive, I admit that. But could you blame me after all that's happened? I'm apprehensive, cautious but I'm not afraid. I want to give it a try, but I've got to know if what I'm feeling is just a figment of my imagination or something concrete. Perhaps you are too, wondering, waiting, hoping. And perhaps we are both doing that same wondering... under the same night sky... right at that granule of sand in the hourglass. Intertwined.

"You give me something that makes me scared alright. This could be nothing, but I'm willing to give it a try. Please give me something, that someday I might know in my heart."

Labels: Thoughts

Traveller fell apart at 4:12 AM


	Now Spinning Heroes Theme - Heroes Soundtrack The Protagonist joel \| content \| driven \| focused \| motive-oriented \| cynical \| analytical \| God-fearing \| jaded \| Frequent Reads Ben Christie Christine Davina Eugene Jasmine Jeremy Jo-ann Kay-Lene Mac Tammy Vivek Past Rants January 2004 February 2004 March 2004 April 2004 May 2004 June 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 Tap My Shoulder		November 18, 2006 New Horizons I've blogged alot in the past year about melancholy, solitude and my dark thoughts. It was unavoidable, given the circumstances I found myself caught in; a maelstrom of uncertainty and hurt, washed away in my own grief and already melancholic nature. It hasn't been easy dealing with the issues this past year, but I'm glad to say I've come out stronger than before. I know I've declared myself free of emotional wreckage more times than I care to remember this year, but I can only say that this time I think it's really behind me. I'm joyful deep down, really I am. Have you ever caught someone's gaze while they're looking dreamy? It's said that when you do, you get a true reflection of that person's soul. Right at that moment. It's amazing what you see when you aren't expecting to, astounding what you feel when you're not willing to. But I think I saw something right at that moment in time, I saw a glimpse of light. Some semblance of hope in an all-too-dreary future. And maybe that's what I need right now, something to kickstart my life back in order. I'm not afraid to try again, and I hope it's mutual. But that's it, isn't it? I can only hope and pray that God's choice prevails. I'm apprehensive, I admit that. But could you blame me after all that's happened? I'm apprehensive, cautious but I'm not afraid. I want to give it a try, but I've got to know if what I'm feeling is just a figment of my imagination or something concrete. Perhaps you are too, wondering, waiting, hoping. And perhaps we are both doing that same wondering... under the same night sky... right at that granule of sand in the hourglass. Intertwined. "You give me something that makes me scared alright. This could be nothing, but I'm willing to give it a try. Please give me something, that someday I might know in my heart." Labels: Thoughts Traveller fell apart at 4:12 AM