June 04, 2006
Somewhere In The Middle
It's June, and as I've always said, time really flies. Funny how we always complain about time crawling at a snail's pace when we least want it to, then once we're out of that little predicament we find ourselves in, it seems to then whizz by in a flash. The memories of me returning on that flight with Rongyao in February still seem fresh in the mind, my ensuing struggle with my inner soul on affairs of the heart and finally, this limbo I seem to find myself in.
Make no mistake, it's limbo I'm currently finding myself stuck in. It's a weird kind of state between acceptance and moving on. Hard to describe and any adjective I can muster up doesn't seem to do justice to it. So I shall leave it at just that: limbo. Whatever the case, I'm really fine. Don't get me wrong. I'm not having a relapse of emotional breakdown or anything. It's really just that....limbo.
In time, this limbo will probably give way. It will, there's no doubt about that. But it's in times like these you find that slowly but surely, the limbo becomes part of you and when it does eventually subside, you find your inner self incomplete once again. Anyhow, it's still 5 months to go before I'm home again for the summer and 4 months since I left Singapore with a heavy heart. Emotionally, physically, I'm just caught in the middle.
"Did you think for a second I would not realise? Tripping hard, falling down onto the ground. 'Cause I can't stand up and I can't fall down. 'Cause I'm somewhere in the middle of this...
Traveller fell apart at 2:48 AM